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Here's some of mine. Some qoutes I've seen in the Star Wars Chat room. Some of these are mine.:
Sometimes I lay awake in bed at night and just look at the stars...Then I wonder, where the hell is my ceiling?
"I’m scared of those nasty big-eyed grey aliens, I think it’s that I don’t understand their motivations. I am confident of my ability to out-think, out-con, or if need be, tire-iron-upside-the-head demonic forces, ghosts and goblins, things that go bump in the night, etc. It’s the notion of something that doesn’t have any desire to talk to me except via anal probe that freaks me out"
Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Star Wars..? heh, I don't see any "Star Wars". All I know is old Palpy sends me to all these backwards ass planets, I get blown off the fucking Death Star, then get sent to a moon on Endor, Then The Emperor goes and gets himself killed and I get stuck here to be sniped at by shitty rebels and smelly Ewoks,...Whoo Hoo, what fun :(
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain."
"Well, just because [Yahoo!] is a thirty-foot armor-plated killing machine doesn't mean that it won't go down with a swift knee to the happy sacks just like anyone else!"
And remember kids:
Life.
You can't win.
You can't break even.
You can't even quit the game
"The more 'Buck Rogers' I try to be, the more 'George Jetson' I become."
"People are cows, and that they do everything they can to avoid thinking, and that they act against their best interest in order to please the will of their charlatan leaders. They desire only to fufill artificial desires concocted for them by people who have only the wish of power. And even the charlatans themselves are so greedy and so blinded by their desire that they are neither free nor happy; they are as much a slave as their own slaves."
May they all burn in Hell.
"At this stage I believe I now understand the truth, which is that Lucas has gone over to the dark side. He is a Darth Billionaire ruling an empire, and is no longer leading a rebellion. He was once a semi-independent force, overshadowed by a dark and powerful business, but still managed to beat the odds and on his own terms, but now he sits on a throne with lightning in his hands and a franchise in his clenched fist."
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out..." ?
I pronounce you an Asshat! May the word be spread throughout the land that Retro has been proclaimed Asshat. So that all who meet him shall know to cast their eyes away from ( insert name) for his crime of being an Asshat, may he forever wear the mark of the Asshat, which is an asshat. And Retro shall be cast out of this place and forced to wander the lands bearing his asshat, that others shall know his shame and not themselves become Asshats! So let it be written, so let it be done. Hail the Emperor!
"Heute abend werden sie mit meinen schmerz und drosselklappe auf meinem hab festgenagelt!"
(Tonight you will be impaled with my pain and choke on my hate!)
"Ich erschrecke ihre kinder und esse ihre lieblingstiere!"
(I will frighten your children and eat your favorite animals!)
"Ich bin zum desecrate ihr land gekommen und ihre innards beim reiten mit serpents ausziehe!"
(I have come to desecrate your land and pull out your innards while riding with serpents!)
"Ihre götter verbiegen zu meinem willen und zu mir willedeflower alles irer jungfrauen!"
(Your gods will bend to my will and I will deflower all of your virgins!)
"Ich bin der kurier des tieres - mit schwarzem herzen und gegabelte zunge!"
(For I am the messenger of the beast - with black heart and forked tongue!)
"without stupidity there is no wisdom and without ugliness there is no beauty so this world does need you after all"
"Kenner Star Wars Toy Prototype Which Failed Miserably. "Learn the Force At Home" Kit. Included self-hypnosis training tapes and rocks to lift. Recalled after thousands of children with no strong parental figure turned to the dark side, killing their parents and saying things like "You are part of the Rebel Alliance and you did not make me the type of sandwich that I like!" while strangling them from across the room. "
"IN REMEMBRANCE With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry La Prise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey," died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in; and then the trouble started."
"It is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country"
Herman Göring
Sometimes I lay awake in bed at night and just look at the stars...Then I wonder, where the hell is my ceiling?
"I’m scared of those nasty big-eyed grey aliens, I think it’s that I don’t understand their motivations. I am confident of my ability to out-think, out-con, or if need be, tire-iron-upside-the-head demonic forces, ghosts and goblins, things that go bump in the night, etc. It’s the notion of something that doesn’t have any desire to talk to me except via anal probe that freaks me out"
Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Star Wars..? heh, I don't see any "Star Wars". All I know is old Palpy sends me to all these backwards ass planets, I get blown off the fucking Death Star, then get sent to a moon on Endor, Then The Emperor goes and gets himself killed and I get stuck here to be sniped at by shitty rebels and smelly Ewoks,...Whoo Hoo, what fun :(
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain."
"Well, just because [Yahoo!] is a thirty-foot armor-plated killing machine doesn't mean that it won't go down with a swift knee to the happy sacks just like anyone else!"
And remember kids:
Life.
You can't win.
You can't break even.
You can't even quit the game
"The more 'Buck Rogers' I try to be, the more 'George Jetson' I become."
"People are cows, and that they do everything they can to avoid thinking, and that they act against their best interest in order to please the will of their charlatan leaders. They desire only to fufill artificial desires concocted for them by people who have only the wish of power. And even the charlatans themselves are so greedy and so blinded by their desire that they are neither free nor happy; they are as much a slave as their own slaves."
May they all burn in Hell.
"At this stage I believe I now understand the truth, which is that Lucas has gone over to the dark side. He is a Darth Billionaire ruling an empire, and is no longer leading a rebellion. He was once a semi-independent force, overshadowed by a dark and powerful business, but still managed to beat the odds and on his own terms, but now he sits on a throne with lightning in his hands and a franchise in his clenched fist."
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out..." ?
I pronounce you an Asshat! May the word be spread throughout the land that Retro has been proclaimed Asshat. So that all who meet him shall know to cast their eyes away from ( insert name) for his crime of being an Asshat, may he forever wear the mark of the Asshat, which is an asshat. And Retro shall be cast out of this place and forced to wander the lands bearing his asshat, that others shall know his shame and not themselves become Asshats! So let it be written, so let it be done. Hail the Emperor!
"Heute abend werden sie mit meinen schmerz und drosselklappe auf meinem hab festgenagelt!"
(Tonight you will be impaled with my pain and choke on my hate!)
"Ich erschrecke ihre kinder und esse ihre lieblingstiere!"
(I will frighten your children and eat your favorite animals!)
"Ich bin zum desecrate ihr land gekommen und ihre innards beim reiten mit serpents ausziehe!"
(I have come to desecrate your land and pull out your innards while riding with serpents!)
"Ihre götter verbiegen zu meinem willen und zu mir willedeflower alles irer jungfrauen!"
(Your gods will bend to my will and I will deflower all of your virgins!)
"Ich bin der kurier des tieres - mit schwarzem herzen und gegabelte zunge!"
(For I am the messenger of the beast - with black heart and forked tongue!)
"without stupidity there is no wisdom and without ugliness there is no beauty so this world does need you after all"
"Kenner Star Wars Toy Prototype Which Failed Miserably. "Learn the Force At Home" Kit. Included self-hypnosis training tapes and rocks to lift. Recalled after thousands of children with no strong parental figure turned to the dark side, killing their parents and saying things like "You are part of the Rebel Alliance and you did not make me the type of sandwich that I like!" while strangling them from across the room. "
"IN REMEMBRANCE With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry La Prise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey," died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in; and then the trouble started."
"It is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country"
Herman Göring
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